Drifting in a whirlwind, it isn’t too much fun
My heart goes pitter-patter thank god I pack no gun.

It gets so very lonely, sitting here alone
Checking for my e-mails, staring at the phone.

I don’t know where I’m headed, haven’t got a clue
I wish something were coming I could go and do.

I read it in the papers, I see it on TV
Endless media coverage, why do they snub me?

It’s not that I am jealous, all right I’m greedy too
They really had it coming, but lucky through and through.

Always super busy, preparing one more show
They’ll mix a little music and everyone will go.

I’ll dial for quick phone sex, or look some up on line
It’s just that I am nothing, ok, I’ll be just fine.

Hemorrhoids on my buttocks, reading day and night
Overcome by boredom, where’s the will to fight?

I guess I have an ego, that is driven still
Sitting in the back seat, feeling kind of ill.

Should try and hustle money, drink another beer
Strive to get it going, not shed another tear.